You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
