Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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