oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
