Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
