Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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