I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
