Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
