We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
