I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
