she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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