My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize