FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize