I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
