That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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