I showed him my bush... on skype.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
