I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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