she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
