I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
