smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
