I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize