I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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