I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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