We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
third nipple confirmed
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
