Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
