We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
i've created a new STD.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
