He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
