Don't you send me to vm
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
