he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
