this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
