Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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