i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
