Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
