we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
