making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
