is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Randomize
