I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
