Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
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