I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
