I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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