fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize