NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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