I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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