i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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