Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
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