I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my shit smells like andre
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
