I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
So many bounce houses so little time
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
