apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
