yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
