I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
