Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I need a burrito and a hug.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
