i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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