its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
