somebody snuck up and got me drunk
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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