You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
